Archive for category “I like to books.”
Enraged Editing
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Bringin' down the grammar hammer., HA! No., Writing about writing. on February 4, 2013
I love writing. It’s fun, it’s relaxing, and it gives me the opportunity to express little nuggets of weird from within the deep recesses of my often twisted mind.
That being said, my true love has always been editing. Any time an editing job makes its way to me, I’m thrilled. No matter the subject, I love looking at an essay, a paper, a story, and doing my part to help it reach its full potential. Each and every piece of writing is a challenge just waiting to be improved upon. To me, it’s a puzzle, and I’m pretty damn good at it.
Unfortunately, there are downsides to considering oneself an editor. I mean, downsides in addition to existing in a world full of appallingly bad writing that seems to leap out from the newspaper, the radio, and an infinite number of other sources to punch you in the brain.
Everyone’s a writer!
Yes, it would appear that each and every individual that fancies him or herself an expert on some topic also magically believes him or herself to be an expert in writing. How convenient, right!? NO, NOT RIGHT. People that have truly good ideas about their field, whatever that field may be, can always benefit from having a skilled writer or editor working with them to brainstorm organizational techniques, target and write toward the appropriate audience, and generally polish their work into a suitable final product. Consulting a writer is a step that is consistently overlooked because too many people believe that, as a speaker of a language, they are also qualified as a writer of said language. This phenomenon is, incidentally, why so many companies decide not to hire writers and is consequently why I am currently toiling away at a job that has nothing to do with my skill set. “Oh, we don’t need someone entirely devoted to writing,” they stupidly declare, “We can just split the writing and editing duties between a few existing employees to save time and money.” Listen, people. Your scientist needs someone to adapt his report to be palatable to the general public. Your receptionist shouldn’t be doing your company newsletter. Your web designer can make your site look pretty, but that doesn’t mean he can write decent content. This is why we can’t have nice things, people. This is why we can’t have nice things.
Passing high school English does not a writer make.
When people learn that you are interested in writing, they instantly feel the need to tell you about how well they did in English class and how many friends’ papers they edited during their college years. Typically, this makes me cringe on behalf of the teachers who received an influx of poorly written, poorly edited papers one semester and never understood why. When I have an acquaintance that continually brings up writing projects, I automatically become suspicious. Soon, I muse, Soon they will ask me to read their books. Sometimes, I’m pleasantly surprised. A few years ago, I had a friend who constantly wanted to talk about his story ideas, and finally asked me to read his first few chapters. It was obvious from his nervousness that he loved his story and desperately hoped I wouldn’t rip it to shreds. He asked me for complete, brutal honesty: it was good, because brutality is really my strong point. Despite a few consistent grammar stumbles, I found his story to be interesting and his characters to be engaging. At the same time, I had another friend who couldn’t have been more confident in her abilities. She believed herself to be above her surroundings, an intellectual in a sea of commoners. One day, she told me she wanted to prepare one of her books to be submitted to publishing houses and asked if I could read it over to look for any minor issues; she had just done a revamp of the book and needed a fresh set of eyes. I spent an hour reading, trying desperately to understand what she was talking about through the flowery language, the muddled sentence structure, and the grammatical butchery. After that hour, I realized I had only gone through seven pages. I told her that the project was longer than I realized and I would have to consider it a freelance project; fortunately, she never brought it up with me again to discuss rates.
Editing vultures.
“Hey, you like writing!” they say. “I have a paper due tomorrow, and I’d like to have someone give it a quick once-over before I turn it in. I’ll email it over!” Editing vultures, as I call them, have a very specific MO. They (being individuals that communicate with you ONLY when they want something) claim to be looking for constructive criticism, but in reality, they want a group of people to say things like, “Wow, this sounds really good!” or “Here’s a typo, but other than that, you’re a great writer!” This is blatantly obvious because they never give you more than 48 hours to review their work. I have a simple way of dealing with these people: I edit the ever loving shit out of whatever they send me. I don’t rewrite things for them, though. Oh, no. Those services are reserved for people who pay for the premium Nancy editing. The free version just gets you 1,000 text boxes in your Word document with such helpful comments as “This is awkward,” “Your sentence structure needs variation,” and “This sentence is unclear; rework it to express your point more effectively.” The last essay I received from an editing vulture had a 500 word limit; my comments alone amounted to about 700 words. So a word to the editing vultures out there? If you really want help, great. For a totally reasonable fee, I would love to read your shitty essay and make suggestions. Otherwise, have fun completely rewriting your paper and dealing with the haunting realization that you have 12 hours to go and no real idea of where to start.
You have a thesaurus?! Congratulations.
There are people in this world that believe with all their hearts that committing something to writing requires complex, nigh unreadable, sentence structure and a multitude of $10 words peppered throughout. In reality, this type of writing serves only to make the writer look like an asshole. Well, at least to experienced writers. Tragically, such pretentious writers tend to congregate together in certain industries and encourage one another to write LONGER sentences and use MORE OBSCURE words! They hang out in packs and try to one-up each other as their giant egos cause their heads to swell until they rupture in a firework show of rampant stupidity. Or at least I like to imagine. In reality, the solution is simple: have you ever used that word in conversation? No? Then why do you think it’s okay to use it in your writing?
So, will I judge you if you say “me and my friend” or “my friend and I” in the wrong section of a sentence? No, it doesn’t matter. Will I make nasty comments when you misspell things in your Facebook status? I’ll roll my eyes and smirk, most definitely, but there are far worse Facebook sins. I just ask that you put a little bit of care into your writing because it’s part of you, and that you respect those that exist to help.
All complaints aside, they best tip I can give in terms of writing is to know your strengths and weaknesses. You have issues with organization? List your ideas and consult with someone before you start writing anything so that you can settle on a solid direction. You have problems with spelling? Make sure to use word processing software with spell check and highlight words you’re unsure of for future reference. A specific word or phrase giving you fits? DON’T USE THAT WORD OR PHRASE.
But let’s be real: my editing pet peeves will not be so easily defeated. They will pop up in my inbox and the professional world for the rest of my days, a written manifestation of fingernails on a chalkboard scraping along the inside of my brain for all eternity. Last week, I read something aloud to boyfriend for confirmation of its awfulness, explaining its grammatical crimes.
“Wow,” he said, “I could tell that sounded wrong, but I wasn’t sure why. Do you always look at written things like that?”
I nodded solemnly.
“Oh man, that must really suck.”
Yes, boyfriend, it does suck. Sometimes, I’m not sure how my brain endures it. Then, I look down at my lap while I’m working on a particularly painful project and see this:
Seriously, cat, everyone is really lucky you exist.
Thanks, Simon! You’re the best at keeping me from smacking people!
Remember me?!
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Big Girl Pill, Bringin' down the grammar hammer., SO CLOSE! on November 21, 2011
To be entirely honest, I don’t!
Since my last post, I recall a few blurry scenes from my life. I remember a nasty cold. I remember an unsettling week-long bout with vertigo. I remember a funeral. I remember writing 10 pages of a memoir for class and deciding to actually go through with it. I remember a buy one-get one half off promotion at Starbucks. And I remember some friends coming to my apartment to watch Urijah Faber pummel some hapless chump on TV, but probably only because that happened two days ago.
The past few weeks have involved a lot of work, a lot of unexpected travel, and a lot of falling asleep at inopportune moments, such as on top of my homework and propped up against my computer monitor at the office. What with a busy spell at my job and a little over two weeks left in graduate school, my life is simply brimming with tasks that I have no desire whatsoever to complete.
But if I can suck it up for two and a half days, I get a brief respite.
As luck would have it, I start my Thanksgiving break this Wednesday at 3:00. I will travel to see family, eat myself into a coma, play with my parents’ weird cat that thinks it’s a dog, nap, eat more, force my mother to do some Black Friday shopping with me, and hassle roommate in new and exciting locations. It will be exactly what I need in order to recharge my brain just enough to finish out my last few assignments and maybe do a few things at work before Christmas break.
SIDE NOTE: as much as I may complain about my job, having a paid recess between Christmas and New Year’s is pretty much the most amazing employment benefit ever. I would happily give up dental insurance for a winter recess at any future job.
December 11th. That starts a new part of my life. A part of my life where I don’t have to worry about balancing full-time work, full-time school, and the tattered remains of a social life. A part of my life where I can exercise regularly once again and say farewell to the squishier, sweatier 2011 version of myself. A part of my life where I am vaguely more qualified to apply for jobs that I might enjoy.
And, most importantly, a part of my life when I’ll get to lord my Master’s degree over those around me.
SIDE NOTE 2 – THE REVENGE: As I was writing the previous sentence, I though, “Eh, I’m not sure if I like using the term ‘lord’ here.” I decided to check out Thesaurus.com because, as explained throughout this blog post, my brain no longer functions. Below is what I found. The highlighting is my own.
Seriously?!
I realize that there is a comma between these two words, but that doesn’t make this thesaurus entry any less…unfortunate. I also realize that if I were a web editor over at Thesaurus.com, such a gaffe would not occur. HINT HINT, THESAURUS.COM.
Hmmm, actually, I’m pretty sure that if I had the opportunity to legitimately publish the term “cock flourish” as part of my job, I would do it in a second. Touché, Thesaurus.com web editor. Touché.
What’s your favorite color?
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", More To Come!, Sometimes I'm a good friend., Vincent Kale on September 1, 2011
Pick a color, any color.
Except orange. God help you if you pick orange.
What am I getting at, you ask? Well, guess what, kids?
Vincent Kale has finally made his next fantastic work of literature, Indigo, available to his adoring public!
I’ll begin by answering the most important question a book review can address: yes, I really, really enjoyed this book. For those of you who are not well acquainted with the science fiction genre, it is important to point out that stories that take place in an alternate time or reality come with their own unique vocabulary and set of sociological environments. Done poorly, sci-fi (or fantasy, for that matter) can alienate the reader by removing them from the story and creating characters and settings that are out of touch with their audience. But a skilled sci-fi writer uses these differences to explore common themes – as well as common flaws – in the human condition. Once Indigo‘s gritty realism latches on, you will frankly forget that you’re reading science fiction.
I love Indigo for its descriptions and its imagery. I was able to create vivid mental pictures of the world and the characters thanks to Kale’s writing style. I think the story would translate beautifully to the big screen. You know, in my imaginary world where people use creative, well-written stories to make movies I would actually want to see.
My only complaint is that, once I had finished reading, I still wanted more. It was a quick read for me…even quicker than my lightning fast marathon reading of Crawl. This book has the kind of story that sticks with you well after you’ve finished it, the types of characters that leave you wondering what they’re doing now that the main story is over. Then you remember that they’re fictional characters, and you feel a little dumb. After you get over that, you begin to anxiously anticipate future installments in the mythology of their new world. Or at least that was my experience.
Well played, Vincent Kale. Well played.
It’s certainly a departure from the creeping terror of Crawl, but Kale makes an impressive transition from the horror genre to a sharp combination of sci-fi, detective fiction, and mystery.
“Don’t worry, you can read me at night.”
The two stories and moods are starkly different, but these books share a very important thread: Kale’s ability to draw out the humanity in a seemingly distant character, be they dystopian future-dweller or mysterious monster. Even for those who loved Crawl for its horror roots, Indigo will not disappoint.
Wait, what do you MEAN, you don’t have a copy of Crawl yet? Check out my review and get yourself over to Lulu to order up your copy now! Or, if you’re cooler/richer than me, you can download a copy for your portable electronic readin’ device.
Well, because I’d like to wrap up this discussion by bring things around full circle (and because it’s been stuck in my head since I posted that rainbow picture), I would like to end on this joyous, almost definitely drug-induced note:
An Important Textbook Shopping Tip
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Bringin' down the grammar hammer., I was confused., Perpetual College Student on May 13, 2011
Doing a thorough price comparison is key when ordering college textbooks. They are unbelievably overpriced, and you will almost definitely get less than half of your money back if you sell them after you’ve finished your classes. It’s a sick, twisted cycle, but there’s not much you can do about it. Well, you can borrow, share, or rent books, but that sounds like a lot of work.
For my current semester, I was informed that I needed to acquire eight books. EIGHT! So I got to work, and magically discovered my most expensive textbook, priced used at $145, for $30. Granted, the binding is falling off, the pages are wrinkled, and it smells funny, but I saved a whopping $115! It’s legible, so I don’t care. I found all of my other books for under $20 apiece (some as low as $1), so that was delightful as well. Now, I must play the waiting game to see if they arrive in time for me to complete my assignments before their due dates.
Well, yesterday, this came in the mail:
Thanks, now I can do my homework!
Hooray! I easily scanned through my first reading assignment and was able to turn in a small writing project. It’s a good book, outlined effectively with lots of helpful tips and clarification of grammar points. Oh, clear and concise comma rules, how I love you!
Today, I got another package in the mail. “YAY,” I thought. “I have nearly all of my textbooks now!” I tore open the packaging to find this:
Oh, it’s you again.
So, it was back to AbeBooks to find the book that I was supposed to order when I ordered a second copy of The Elements of Business Writing. Back to the waiting game, I guess.
Kids, be sure that when doing price comparisons online, especially when you are searching for a large number of items, you have a clear list of what items you’ve already purchased. If not, you will end up with multiple copies of the same thing. Take it from someone who knows and has a large, repetitive book collection to show for it.
Crawling Toward Semester’s End
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Creeeeeeeeepy, More To Come!, Vincent Kale on March 30, 2011
Well, SOMEONE has been quite the avid little reader lately! A few weeks back, I mentioned how utterly delighted I was to receive my friend Vincent Kale’s novel, Crawl. Unfortunately, spring semester has been thoroughly grinding me into a despondent paste and I haven’t had the opportunity to delve into it. This weekend, having finally excavated myself from underneath the mountain of work that’s been threatening to crush me, I thought I’d give myself a little treat and read a chapter or two.
That didn’t work out so well.
I read this book in three sittings, and it would have been one had I not had two jobs and homework to be concerned with. It sunk its claws into me and refused to let go until the very last page, a feat not easily accomplished due to my impressively inadequate attention span.
Crawl draws you in immediately, wasting no time in delivering its first scare. Emotions run the gamut: terrified, suspicious, angry, disturbed, hopeful, shocked, heartbroken. Kale masterfully controls the tone throughout the book, carefully leading the reader down his winding, eerie trail. But not a page is wasted; the pace is set in a way that will gnaw at you if you’re forced to step away from the book. The story presents its twists and turns from multiple different points of view to keep things fresh and, at times, jarring. But as you grow to understand the titular Crawl, you begin to realize that perhaps there are more monsters in this story than initially meet the eye.
I will say that Crawl was not what I anticipated; it was much, much more. After reading the first chapter out loud (and thusly disrupting my friend’s sleep patterns for a few days), I was prepared for a creepy, gorey monster tale that would entertain me right out of my skin. What I got was certainly all of that, but with an unexpected depth of character and emotion. I will also say that everyone should visit Vincent Kale’s blog, Crawlspace, to keep up with his comings and goings and head over to Lulu to grab a copy of the book. Kale is most definitely an author to watch and watch I shall, along with his already (rightfully!) growing fanbase. If Crawl is any indication, we will have many literary treats from this writer as time goes on.
So, to my readers: get the book already, will ya? Let me know what you think!
And to Vincent Kale: good job, friend!
And now for something completely different… Book review!
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Another action movie reference?, Keepin' it Classy, PWR 662 on March 25, 2011
So, you’ve decided to join the 21st century and address the influx of social media as it pertains to your business and your customers. Congratulations!
Well, now what?
According to Forrester Researchers Charlene Li and Josh Bernoff, you listen to the people, that’s what. Their book, Groundswell: Winning in a World Transformed by Social Technologies, provides a crash course in how to navigate the growing tide of networking sites and blogs, and how to use it to your advantage.
“Hey guys! Learning about online marketing can be fun!”
I’ll be totally honest: when I first got Groundswell, I had no idea what the groundswell was. According to the book, the groundswell can be defined as “a social trend in which people use technologies to get the things they need from each other, rather than from traditional institutions like corporations (9).” Sounds simple enough! Consumers can connect with each other more and more easily through social media, and now corporations need to figure out how to keep up. So how are customers using their newfound power to interact and make changes? How are corporations reacting? What are the benefits and drawbacks for people on both sides of the equation? Li and Bernoff provide case studies in every chapter to illustrate the groundswell in action, but the real value of this book is in the basic framework it sets forth for companies looking to find their way in the ever-changing social networking landscape.
The authors realize that technologies change much faster than a book could hope to keep up with, so they introduce a series of steps to approaching social media: POST – people, objectives, strategy, then technology. If you focus on the people first and your goals and plans next, the technology itself becomes a means to accomplish your objectives rather than the driving force behind your company’s actions. In addition, Groundswell introduces the idea of the Social Technographics Profile, which encourages companies to understand their target audience and their social networking habits and trends. Li and Bernoff don’t preach, they offer a plan of attack and provide concrete examples of groundswell techniques in action. Their conversational tone makes this book accessible to newbies while its underlying principles and case studies make it a must-read for those in the business, according to…well, those in the business.
As this book ages, the examples will not stay fresh (hey, have you checked your MySpace page lately?); it’s the nature of the subject. The approach to social networking from the perspective of a business and lessons from the case studies, though, can be applied to new technology and new situations. It’s not a comprehensive guide to online marketing, but it is a great starting point. Forrester’s groundswell blog gives readers a forum to put the book’s techniques into action by staying current, commenting, and interacting.
In what seems to be an exquisite example of poetic justice, Groundswell has garnered great acclaim from its namesake. And how could it not? This book encourages businesses to get involved and play toward the wants and needs of consumers who use the technology involved with the groundswell to create a voice for themselves. The groundswell itself has been the biggest proponent of Groundswell, which frankly says a lot about its credibility. Just check out the Amazon reviews to see the positive feedback from readers.
This book appeals to more than just fumbling marketing directors who feel out of touch with the Facebook generation. Am I a businessperson? No. Am I trying to market to a consumer base? Not so much. Do I know how to use Facebook? ::ahem:: I’ve been known to post on a wall occasionally. But I enjoyed this book. It was well written, well organized, and explained its theories and examples effectively. I feel as though I have a much greater understanding of how customer opinion and involvement can help a company, and how a company can garner customer support using new and innovative techniques. Personally, I loved the stories of customers creating positive change, like the eBags case study in which a company was able to learn of and correct a manufacturing problem due to customer reviews. It’s reassuring to know that companies are beginning to understand that connecting with and pleasing their customer base is the best (the only, really) way to do good business.
Regardless of whether you like it or not, strategic use of social technologies and an understanding of your customer base will make you or it will break you. So, what can we take from Li and Bernoff’s research, case studies, and observations?
Respect the groundswell.
Things that go EEEEEEEEEEK in the night.
Posted by Nancy in "I like to books.", Creeeeeeeeepy, Friend Torment, More To Come!, Vincent Kale on February 27, 2011
How do you feel about horror stories? Favorable? Perhaps even enthusiastic? Then do I have a book recommendation for you.
I hope you didn’t want to sleep tonight or anything.
This weekend, I received my long-awaited copy of Crawl by Vincent Kale. You see, Vincent is a good friend of mine who, in my opinion, should have been published long ago. Up to this point, I’ve only read bits and pieces of this particular story and have been itching for more. Well, maybe itching isn’t quite the right term; maybe to say my skin has been crawling would be slightly more appropriate.
Another friend is visiting me for a few weeks, and we thought that a fun way to spend the evening might be to have a dramatic reading of Crawl. Well, to be fair, I thought it would be fun. Mainly because my friend has an extremely low tolerance for scary books and movies. Heh. I started off by reading the first chapter aloud, after which my friend announced, “Wow, that was really good! Let’s never read any more of that after dark ever again!”
After I finish up with Crawl, I plan on posting a full review. Until then, horror fans, you can get your own copy at Lulu.com. Search Vincent Kale and support an up-and-coming artist! And, you know, be sure to keep the lights on.
A Cut Above...Something 